James Allen HanrahanJames Allen Hanrahan

By James Hanrahan

3 Ways To Tell If He’s EVER Going To Be Ready To Commit

When you been dating a guy for a while it’s hard to tell if he’s ever going to be ready to commit.

One day he’s talking about getting you a ring and dreaming about a future, the next you’re getting the cold shoulder.

Before you spend any more time trying to figure him out. Here are three ways to tell if he’s ever going to be ready to commit.

1. A plan.

The first and most important thing is, does he have an actual concrete plan to commit.

Has he told you when he wants to get engaged or married to you? Or when he wants to get you a ring.

Without a specific time frame, you don’t have a plan, you have a dream.

Speaking of time if a man has been dating you for over a year and has no plan, it’s a major red flag he’s not going to commit.

When a guy is on the fence he tends to stay on the fence.

2. Purpose.

Every person and every relationship must have a purpose. If you and your guy or not aiming toward something, building a family, getting a house, getting married etc. the relationship will stagnate.

What makes a relationship exciting and causes you to grow are new challenges.

When you face them together your relationship gets stronger. Without them, your relationship will become boring and he’ll wonder why he’s not excited to see you.

Men have to have a purpose for themselves in life and for the relationship with you.

3. Time.

Men by nature don’t have a sense of urgency to have children. They’re perfectly fine with having children someday.

Unfortunately, this is not going to work for you. If you’re hoping by avoiding the topic and by having a good time, he will suddenly come around. This is a poor strategy.

Men are all about momentum. If after a year of dating you, he doesn’t have a plan you’re losing momentum.

I strongly suggest you require a plan, know what the purpose of your relationship is, and don’t let time slip away on you.

Men commit to what you require to be in a relationship. You have to know what that is for you. The key here is to love him, but not more than yourself.

When you’re willing to walk away when necessary from a man who doesn’t have a plan or a purpose, you’re ready to be with one who does.

Hopefully, you will inspire the guy you’re with to take the journey with you. Having a plan and a purpose are concepts a man can relate to.

Either way, you will know by his actions if he’s ever going to be ready to commit and you can decide what’s best for you. Love him, but not more than yourself.

James Allen Hanrahan is a highly sought after dating and relationship coach for STRONG women based in Los Angeles. Get his FREE Chemistry to Commitment formula for lasting love. If you’re a smart woman struggling to achieve relationship success, check out the treasure trove of men’s secrets to fall in love in Dating Advice for Alpha Women.

By James Hanrahan

The BEST Time To Ask Where’s This Relationship Going

It’s the hardest question to ask, yet if you don’t know the answer to it, it’s the most unnerving. You may be waiting for the right time however when is the right time?

There are three moments where it’s imperative that you ask. Let’s look at these three moments and when is, the best time to ask where’s this relationship going?

1. Before it gets going. This is by far the best time to ask because you don’t have to ask. You can require and negotiate a long-term plan before you get into the relationship.

In fact the reason you don’t know where the relationship is going is because you didn’t talk about it and agree to where the relationship is going before you got started.

2. Its been a year. Men are all about momentum. If its been a year and you haven’t heard anything, you’re losing momentum.

Men don’t suddenly wake up one morning and decide they want to get married. They have to be concerned about losing you.

If it’s been a year, say; “I’ve really enjoyed our year together of dating however I feel uncomfortable, I don’t want to date without a long-term plan what do you think?

Then listen intently because you’re about to get your answer.

I’m not saying you’re not going to meet resistance. You have to be comfortable with that, because if you really want to have a relationship you have to be willing to risk losing it.

3. You don’t feel good about it. This can happen at any time but it usually happens when it’s been too long.

The body doesn’t lie, if your instincts are telling you something is off. You need to talk about it.

Remember you can negotiate or renegotiate anytime even if you’ve never talked about it. However you may have to take your cards off the table.

A man isn’t going to negotiate with you if he’s already getting everything he wants for free. I.e. sex.

Say; “I really like you and I have enjoyed our time together however I’ve made a mistake. I had intercourse with you without knowing what our long-term plan is and I don’t feel comfortable with that. What do you think?”

A man who cares about how you feel will take your feelings into consideration. He will come up with a plan to alleviate you’re uncomfortable feelings that you both can agree on.

A relationship is a series of kept agreements. Relationships are built on the bad days, not the good days. Uncomfortable conversations only happen with people who love you.

The best time to have a conversation about where the relationship is going is before the relationship gets going.

The next is, if it’s been a year and you’re losing momentum.

The last is when you don’t feel good about it and your body wants clarity because the uncertainty is turning you off.

James Allen Hanrahan is a highly sought after dating and relationship coach for SMART women based in Los Angeles. Get his FREE Chemistry to Commitment formula for lasting love. If you’re an Alpha woman struggling to achieve relationship success, check out the treasure trove of information in Dating Advice for Alpha Women.

3 Ways To Tell If He’s EVER Going To Be Ready To Commit
The BEST Time To Ask Where’s This Relationship Going