James Allen HanrahanJames Allen Hanrahan

By James Hanrahan

The 3 Secrets Why Men Don’t Commit [According to A Guy]

If you’ve been with a guy for a while and you see no signs of commitment. There are three BIG reasons why a man doesn’t commit.

Fortunately for you, they’re all things you can do something about.

Because while he may have many excuses why he can’t commit right now, the solution boils down to these three secrets.

1. There’s no risk of losing you.

When you live with a guy, or spend all your time at his place, you’re basically a free wife.

The first reason he won’t commit to you is, there’s no risk of losing you.

The main reason a man takes on the responsibility of marrying you is, he doesn’t want to lose you.

It’s as simple as, why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free. [I’ll share with you how to change this in a minute.]

Which brings us to the second reason why he won’t commit.

2. He’s too comfortable.

When he’s already getting all the sex and companionship he wants from you, without taking on any responsibility. The next problem you have is, he’s too comfortable.

He may blame his job, or his financial situation, or any other number of excuses. However if a man really wants something he will move heaven and earth to get it.

However, if he’s already getting you for free, the real problem is he’s too comfortable.

3 Take things off the table.

The good news is, you have a solution. It’s time to take things off the table.

There’s only one way for a guy to find out he can’t live without you. There has to be the risk of losing you.

If you’re ready to take things off the table the first thing and the biggest thing to take off the table is sex.

To do this say, “I’ve really enjoyed our year plus of being together however I don’t feel comfortable continuing to have sex without an engagement ring and/or an agreement for a wedding date within the next six months to a year.” Pause. Followed by “what do you think?”

I know it’s a mouthful. However if there’s no risk of losing you and he’s too comfortable; if you don’t take things off the table, chances are nothing is going to change. [ to get coaching click here.]

You’re going to meet resistance, he may even pull away or decide to break up with you. Whatever it is, be patient, hold your ground, don’t argue with him and let him figure it out.

In the end this is not about him. It’s about your own self-worth and self-value. The reason why men don’t commit is because they don’t feel they have to. The reason they do commit is because you require it, and you’re worth it.

If he’s up for the challenge he’s your man, if not, he’s someone else’s boy.

James Allen Hanrahan is a highly sought after dating and relationship coach for STRONG women based in Los Angeles. Get his FREE Chemistry to Commitment formula for lasting love. If you’re a smart woman struggling to achieve relationship success, check out the treasure trove of men’s secrets to fall in love in Dating Advice for Alpha Women.

By James Hanrahan

3 UNMISTAKABLE Signs a Man’s in Love With You

When you want to know if a man is in love with you, it doesn’t matter what he says. It matters what he does.

For men love is a verb and when he’s in love with you, he takes action.

With that in mind, here are three actions that are clear signs he’s in love with you.

1. Momentum.

Men are all about momentum. From the moment he meets you and gets your number, if he calls you right away and makes an effort to see you, he’s on his way to being in love with you.

If he can wait a few weeks to see you, or sees you once and then waits for another month, he doesn’t have momentum and he’s wasting your time.

The first thing to look for is, does he have momentum.

2. Escalation.

Lots of guys start out fast. They want to see you all the time and then suddenly vanish.

A guy who’s falling in love with you, wants to build something with you.

This means he wants to do a variety of things with you. He wants you to meet his friends, his family etc. you feel he’s including you in his life.

Escalation means he’s not just dating and having sex with you. He’s building a life with you and adding complexity to what you do together.

3. Responsibility.

When a man falls in love with you he suddenly wants to give up his freedom that he values so highly, and be responsible for you.

This simply means he takes your feelings into account and there are no sudden disappearing acts. He makes and keeps agreements with you without hesitation.

When a man falls in love with you being in a relationship is his idea. He asks you to be exclusive because he doesn’t want to lose you. He has momentum and he’s goal oriented. The goal is to be with you.

He invites you into his life and you feel the relationship is escalating. You sense, he cares about how you feel and he welcomes the responsibility to make long-range plans with you. These are the signs, and this is how to tell a man’s in love with you.

James Allen Hanrahan is a highly sought after dating and relationship coach for STRONG women based in Los Angeles. Get his FREE Chemistry to Commitment formula for lasting love. If you’re a smart woman struggling to achieve relationship success, check out the treasure trove of  men’s secrets to fall in love in Dating Advice for Alpha Women.

By James Hanrahan

The Turn Him ON Slow Formula That Attracts Quality Men

When a guy likes you, he’s turned on and he can’t help himself. His enthusiasm is off the charts. He wants to see you all the time and he’s got big plans.

Enthusiasm is important and you want a man to have it. The only problem is it distorts his sense of reality. This is where you come in.

In order to turn his enthusiasm into reality you’re going to have to slow him down without squelching his enthusiastic bliss.

The hard part is to turn his enthusiasm into responsibility. This is done by letting him know what you require to be in a relationship.

Men demonstrate love by what they’re willing to be responsible for. This means you can count on him for more than just the feeling of love.

Slowing a man down allows him to consider the more practical aspects of a relationship. It requires him to come up with a plan.

The first way to slow a man down and the most sobering is to not have intercourse with him until you get to know him better.

You do this by letting him know that you think he’s smart, funny, handsome etc. however you don’t feel comfortable having intercourse until you get to know him better.

This allows him to get to know you as a human being, not just someone he’s attracted to.

When a man gets overly focused on sex, he loses sight of reality and stops making plans with you.

Slowing him down allows him to stay enthusiastic about having a relationship with you and winning you over. When a man is focused on reality and creating a definitive plan for you, he’s turned on slow and you’re on your way to having a long-term relationship.

James Allen Hanrahan is a highly sought after dating and relationship coach for SMART women based in Los Angeles. Get his FREE Chemistry to Commitment formula for lasting love. If you’re a smart woman struggling to achieve relationship success, check out the treasure trove of information in A Life of Love.

The 3 Secrets Why Men Don’t Commit [According to A Guy]
3 UNMISTAKABLE Signs a Man’s in Love With You
The Turn Him ON Slow Formula That Attracts Quality Men