If you’ve ever had a great first date and wonder where the guy went like many of my clients share with me you’re not alone: it’s epidemic.
With that in mind here are 3 reasons in an attempt to solve the mystery of disappearing men.
1. First dates are easy for men. Lots of adrenaline and anticipation without a lot of reality to put a damper on it. In other words novelty and newness are easy to enjoy.
The first time we do anything is exciting. Some men get stuck on novelty and are unable to build anything long-term with a woman.
2. Second dates are hard for men. After a first date men tend to think things through: I mean all the way through. For example a first date driving an hour to see you is no problem. A second date means it will be a way of life. In other words reality sets in.
When a man first meets you realty is not even in the equation. Men rarely think things through until they realize it’s going to take effort to be with you.
3. Commitment takes reality. A man has to want and be ready for a relationship financially and emotionally: then he has to be smitten; in that order.
Lots of men get smitten easily however reality is hard on them when they know they’re not ready and sense that you are.
Men don’t make seconds dates they don’t think they can be successful at regarding their goal. Whether it’s having sex with you right away or the reality of building a relationship.
This is good news because the man you want will have momentum and a plan that will breeze through a second date on the way to the third.
He will have the essential quality of men who can have relationships: he can make and keep agreements. This means reality is not a problem; it’s a gift he welcomes.
James Allen Hanrahan is a highly sought after dating and relationship coach for STRONG women based in Los Angeles. Get his FREE Chemistry to Commitment formula for lasting love. If you’re a smart woman struggling to achieve relationship success, check out the treasure trove of information in A Life of Love.