James Allen HanrahanJames Allen Hanrahan

by James Hanrahan

You have to know how, and when to say no to men.

You meet him at a party. You like him and you’ve got chemistry. Now the moment you’ve been waiting for. Yes, he asks for your number and sounds like he wants a date.

He calls you the next day and you’re excited to hear from him. That is until you hear his plan. “How about you meet me at the sports bar around 10 PM. It’s close to my house and I’ll meet you over there.”

You’re shocked and angered at his insensitivity. Doesn’t he know you’re a woman and the sports bar is on the bad side of town. You’re certainty not comfortable going there by yourself, but you have one small problem. How do you say no to a guy you just met and you’re interested in dating?

The first thing you do is you let him know you appreciate is somewhat ludicrous plan. You do this by saying, “I really appreciate you wanting to invite me over to the sports bar late at night, on the dark side of town. However I don’t feel comfortable, I’m a woman and it doesn’t feel good for me to do that.

Then you ask him the million dollar question. “What do you think?” Afterward you become all ears, because you want to listen for his answer.

If he says something along the lines “Hey, don’t worry about it. It’s not that late, the neighborhood is safe and you have nothing to worry about.” You’ve now gathered some very important information. He doesn’t care how you feel.

It’s called getting to know you. This is why you date men, you want to find out how they handle reality.

If on the other hand he says “I understand. Hey, let me come get you and pick you up. We’ll go earlier. I’ll take you somewhere closer to your house and we’ll get something to eat.”  this is a man who cares about how you feel.

It’s important to say no to a guy when he asks you for something that you don’t feel comfortable with. Trust your feelings and when he comes up with some outrageous request simply state.

“I appreciate your (outrageous) offer however I don’t feel comfortable meeting you in a dark alley at 2 AM in a bad neighborhood. What do you think?

A man who cares about how you feel is your man. A man who belittles or discounts your feelings and requests is too selfish to be in a relationship.

Men demonstrate love by being selfless and caring about you. Women love by being self-centered and knowing how and when to say no.

James Allen Hanrahan is a dating relationship coach in Los Angeles. Get his FREE Chemistry to Commitment formula for lasting love.

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1 Comment

  • Lilian
    8:57 AM - 12 December, 2016

    Beautiful lesson and hard truth. Thank you

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How To Say No To A Guy You’re Dating [That WORKS]