By James Hanrahan

3 Reasons Why Men Cheat That Have ZERO To Do With Sex

Contrary to popular believe men don’t want to cheat. It’s often a last resort and oddly enough it’s often a last resort to stay in a relationship.

This next statement will sound strange. Men cheat because they love you. Otherwise they would just leave you. If you hear a man say “I love you, but I’m not in love with you.” Here are 3 possible reasons that even he’s not aware of; why men cheat.

1. You’ve lost respect for him. Men are keenly aware of whether or not you respect them. You may have respected him in the beginning, but over time you may have lost respect for him.

It shows in your criticism of his thinking or his plans. Or you’re questioning of why he is doing something, or not doing something. The symptoms are all there but you might not have noticed because you just want him to be better.

2. Wanting more, better, or different.
In fairness the second one has nothing to do with you. Men and all of us are susceptible to wanting more better and different. We are not monogamous by nature. It’s a choice we make when we want to build something with someone.

The question I would ask you is what are you building? What purpose do you have together in your relationship? Every relationship has to have a purpose otherwise people in it are prone to drifting off, losing focus, and becoming distracted by others. The antidote to more, better and different is knowing your purpose and doing it together.

3. Admiration. This is something men often don’t know that they need. The reason a man cheats that has zero to do with sex is that he craves admiration. He craves someone who looks up to him, who admires his thinking, his sense of humor, his character, his production in the world. All things you might have done in the beginning. All things that have nothing to do with sex.

Men know intuitively that a woman can only fall in love and stay in love with a man when she’s looking up to. When she starts looking down the relationship is in trouble. This is why adoration is so vital to a relationship and it has zero to do with sex.

To be honest men don’t thrive on sex. They thrive on respect, purpose and admiration. In their hearts men don’t want to cheat. They will stay in relationships well beyond their expiration date. They hold out hope even when there seems to be little.

You may say I’m overly optimistic about men and maybe it’s because I am one. However I will say to you that cheating is painful for a man as well as a woman. That cheating has almost zero to do with sex and everything to do with respect, purpose and admiration.

James Allen Hanrahan is a Relationship Coach in Los Angeles. Get his FREE Chemistry to Commitment formula.