James Allen HanrahanJames Allen Hanrahan
04
Jun, 2019

By James Hanrahan

3 Questions To Ask Your Boyfriend To Find Out If He’s Marriage Material

Having a boyfriend is great! But sometimes you just don’t know where it’s going? You’ve been together but he hasn’t said anything about the future.

You can be wondering if there are questions you can ask your boyfriend to find out if he is marriage material?

This is a delicate subject because men typically don’t react well to these types of questions.

With this in mind, here are three questions you can ask your boyfriend to find out without him even knowing it if his marriage material.

1. You listen closely.

Before we get to the questions I have a question ask you. Have you been listening to what your boyfriend’s been saying? Does he have any plans for you to do things in the future? Have you met any of his family and friends?

The reason I ask this is that if none of these things have happened yet asking him a question to find out if he’s marriage material or not will be an act of frustration.

Any question you ask a man has to be based on what he’s already doing. If he is showing signs of future plans, this is already a sign that he is marriage material With no questions asked. But this is certainly not the end of it.
2. What do you require?
The most important question you ever have to ask is what do you require to be in a relationship with a man? The question to ask yourself before you ask him is what is it I want that I don’t have? And what is it I have that I don’t want? In this relationship.
The very reason you’re wondering what questions to ask your boyfriend to find out if his marriage material is that you never told him what it takes to be in a relationship with you.
There are three basic questions you can ask any man no matter how far along in a relationship you are or if it’s just beginning. They are foundational to any long-term relationship. And frankly, you may be surprised at the answers.
3. The 3 questions.
Hopefully, you’ve asked these questions at the beginning of your relationship, but if you’re like many of my coaching clients you haven’t.
The first question is proposed this way. “I know we’ve been together for quite a while but I made mistake and, this may seem obvious to you but, I never asked you, “do you want to be monogamous with me sexually and socially?“
Assuming his answer the first question was on point. The second question is “I really enjoy seeing each other however have you ever thought about how often you would enjoy seeing each other every week? What do you think is ideal for you?
Please remember we’re gathering information and if you don’t like the answers to the first two questions there’s no need to ask the third one.
But assuming you like where this is going. Here’s a third question and this is by far the most important question that I share with all my clients and I strongly insist that they require before they are ever starting a relationship.

But for the sake of this situation, here it is “I really enjoy being in our relationship however I made a mistake. I never asked you do you want to be in a long-term relationship and if things go well the possibility of marriage and children?”

Many of my clients balk at this particular question. It is the hardest one to ask, I know. However, if you do not ask it we will never know if a guy is wasting your time and it won’t be his fault! Because you never required a plan.

If you take nothing else away from this please before you spend any more time with a guy find out, does the guy you’re with want to build with you? Can he see a future aiming towards marriage and children? Is that what he wants? Share your vision and ask him what he thinks?
Once he starts talking listen closely. Avoid the temptation to argue with him or explain anything. To any statement he makes I want you to respond with “I understand.”

He may say things that are uncomfortable or painful for you to hear. However, if you can sit back and listen and stay firm on what you require for him to be in a relationship with you often times if you do not argue with him you will get it.

There are no guarantees but it has been my experience with my clients that it works. The reason is he doesn’t want to lose you but if there’s no risk of losing you there’s no reason for him to marry you or have a long-term plan.

What this in mind remember, 1. Listen 2. Be clear about what you require. 3. Ask him the three questions regarding monogamy, continuity, and longevity listed above.
Self-love is the ability to ask for what you want in a respectful way. Men are awakened and inspired by what you require, and the self-esteem you possess to believe you deserve it.
James Allen Hanrahan is a highly sought after relationship coach for strong women based in Los Angeles who offers a free Chemistry to Commitment formula for lasting love. If you’re a smart woman struggling to achieve relationship success, and tired of dating the wrong guys, connect with him via his complimentary call calendar link to make finding time easy.
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07
Jan, 2019

By James Hanrahan

3 Things Men Want More Than Sex

You might think men want nothing more than sex. While, it is certainly often in their minds, there are three things that are more valuable to men than sex.

In order for a man to fall in love with you, he will unknowingly even to him be looking for these 3 things.

With that in mind, here are the 3 things men want more than sex. I hope these will inspire you to understand the men you date and what men really want when they fall in love with you.

1. Acceptance.

Men want acceptance for who they are right now. Not, who they are going to be in 5 or 10 years but for who they are in this moment.

We all want acceptance but, for men, it is the cornerstone of any long-term relationship.

A man knows that if you do not like his job, his friends, the way he spends his free time, etc. that in the long run, he will have no chance with you.

There’s a long-standing joke that when a man sees his woman as she’s walking down the aisle, he says she looks amazing I hope she never changes.

When a woman sees her man walking down the aisle, she says to herself, I can change him.

There’s a lot of truth in this joke. Men don’t change. If you can accept that, you’re on your way to really have a great man for the rest of your life. Because you already truly like him the way he is.

2. Appreciation.

Most good men follow a very simple equation. When you appreciate what they already do, they will do more.

Men fall in love when they give. They are literally looking for ways to give to you. However, if they get the impression that you don’t appreciate it, or they can’t make you happy, they will give up.

Appreciating what he already does may be very hard for you to do. Because, frankly, some men don’t do much. However, if you can simply start by appreciating the little things they already do, I assure you they will do more, and thank you for it!

3. Admiration.

Now, you may be saying, you’ve gone too far, admiration? Yes, admiration.

Admiration, in this context simply means you admire some aspect of him. Perhaps, it’s his sense of humor, or his work ethic, or the way he treats his family and friends. The key here is to find some aspect that you do admire about him and tell him.

Admiration for a man goes hand-in-hand with respect. Men know that a woman most often can only fall in love with a man she respects.

If you’re with a man that for any reason you don’t respect, please let him go. You only be hurting yourself and him in the long run.

However if you do respect him, the greatest gift you can give a man is to tell him, I respect you.
Respect, inspires a man to be a better man.

You have all the cards to be with the man you want.
The 3 keys to remember are acceptance, appreciation, and admiration.

When you accept a man the way he is right now. You are building a strong foundation for a long-term relationship.

When you appreciate what he’s already doing. when he gets the sense that he can make you happy. He will feel that he can win with you and it will inspire him to no end.

When you admire and respect a man, you give him the confidence to be his best self. Men choose a woman for the long-term by the way he feels when he’s with you.

It’s a simple equation to understanding what good men want. Acceptance, appreciation, and admiration. When you give them to a man, he will fall deeply in love with you.

James Allen Hanrahan is a highly sought after relationship coach for STRONG women based in Los Angeles. Get his FREE Chemistry to Commitment formula for lasting love. If you’re a smart woman struggling to achieve relationship success, I’d love to connect. Here’s my calendar link to make finding time easy.

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03
Mar, 2018

By James Hanrahan

How To Make A Guy Totally Infatuated With You

Turning him on is just the beginning…
If you’ve ever wondered what makes a guy infatuated with you, it’s a good point to consider.
Chemistry is the foundation of any relationship and we live too long to be without it. This is especially true for men as well as you.
Men are visual, the moment they lay their eyes on you they instantly know if they’re infatuated with you or not.
With that in mind here are three points to consider that make men infatuated with you.
 
1. Get in his eyes.
Infatuation starts with eye contact. The eyes are the windows to the soul and when you open them a man can fall deeply in love with you.
Men are looking for a connection. When you make eye contact and smile at him he sees it as an invitation to connect with you.
Many of my clients tell me that when they’re attracted to a guy they don’t look at him. This is obviously counterproductive. It doesn’t work with a gentleman. Drunks and players will approach you without eye contact, gentleman will look for a signal from you.
Looking in the eyes of a man will put you miles ahead of other women. Try it and see the results.
2. Let him in your ears.
Infatuation for you as a woman is important. And the way to get it is to let him get into your ears.
Listen to what he has to say, find out what he’s doing in his life, and what if any future plans he has for you

A man with a plan becomes more and more attractive over time.
When a man is infatuated with you he will tell you everything you need to hear. If you don’t hear things that sound good, he’s not infatuated with you and it’s time to move on.
3. Get into his heart.
You want to move a man. You do this by getting into his heart. Men are attracted to you when it’s easy to be with you. When they sense you respect them and want to know what they think.
This is the subtlety that’s often missed with infatuation. Men are not just looking at you there looking through you. They intuitively know if you’re right for them. They do this by gauging if they’re comfortable with you. If it’s a fun and playful experience that leads to something more serious.
It starts when you look him in the eyes. It sparks when he begins a conversation with you.
When he’s talking listen carefully. Men will tell you everything you need to hear right from the beginning.
When you’re able to get to his heart you’re on your way to building something that’s bigger than the initial infatuation. A solid man is a joy to be with.
This is just the beginning of your adventure together. Get in his eyes, listen with your ears and you’ll unlock his heart. Men want to fall in love with you its what they’re looking for.
James Allen Hanrahan is a highly sought after relationship coach for STRONG women based in Los Angeles. Get his FREE Chemistry to Commitment formula for lasting love. If you’re a smart woman struggling to achieve relationship success, check out the treasure trove of information in Dating Advice For Alpha Women.

 

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28
May, 2017

By James Hanrahan

3 Ways To Tell How MUCH A Guy Likes You

When you meet a guy it’s hard to tell how interested he is in you. Is he thinking hook up, relationship, or does he even like you?

A guy’s level of interest basically breaks down into three categories. The categories are lust, like and love.

A relationship has elements of all three. With that in mind, here’s how to tell a guy’s level of interest and how much a guy likes you..

1. Lust.

At this level you can tell he’s definitely attracted to you and wants to hook up. This is a good start, the problem is when it’s also the finish line.

This means he gets stuck at this level and isn’t interested in taking the time to get to know you.

For example he tries to make out with you and if you don’t immediately return the favor, he loses interest. This is because he’s not at the second level. The second level is…

2. Like.

The difference between a man who can have a relationship and a guy who can only hook up is found at this level.

As crazy as it sounds, a man who can have a relationship with you, likes you. The way you tell he likes you is he enjoys spending time with you and he doesn’t care what you’re doing.

A guy whose stuck at the lust level is only concerned with having sex. A guy at the like level enjoys getting to know you, because he likes you.

3. Love.

When you put things together the chemistry of lust get you in the game.

The friendship of like shows a man has an interest in your humanity.

To know if a man is at the level of love with you, plays out over time. It shows in his ability to make and keep agreements with you consistently.

It shows in his desire to build with you. A man at the level of love sees you in his future and creates a roadmap to get there. He knows how to blend his lust and like for you, into a love that lasts. You can measure a man’s ability to love you, by how much he likes you.

James Allen Hanrahan is a highly sought after dating and relationship coach for STRONG women based in Los Angeles. Get his FREE Chemistry to Commitment formula for lasting love. If you’re a smart woman struggling to achieve relationship success, check out the treasure trove of men’s steps to fall in love in A Life of Love.

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20
May, 2017

By James Hanrahan

3 UNMISTAKABLE Signs a Man’s in Love With You

When you want to know if a man is in love with you, it doesn’t matter what he says. It matters what he does.

For men love is a verb and when he’s in love with you, he takes action.

With that in mind, here are three actions that are clear signs he’s in love with you.

1. Momentum.

Men are all about momentum. From the moment he meets you and gets your number, if he calls you right away and makes an effort to see you, he’s on his way to being in love with you.

If he can wait a few weeks to see you, or sees you once and then waits for another month, he doesn’t have momentum and he’s wasting your time.

The first thing to look for is, does he have momentum.

2. Escalation.

Lots of guys start out fast. They want to see you all the time and then suddenly vanish.

A guy who’s falling in love with you, wants to build something with you.

This means he wants to do a variety of things with you. He wants you to meet his friends, his family etc. you feel he’s including you in his life.

Escalation means he’s not just dating and having sex with you. He’s building a life with you and adding complexity to what you do together.

3. Responsibility.

When a man falls in love with you he suddenly wants to give up his freedom that he values so highly, and be responsible for you.

This simply means he takes your feelings into account and there are no sudden disappearing acts. He makes and keeps agreements with you without hesitation.

When a man falls in love with you being in a relationship is his idea. He asks you to be exclusive because he doesn’t want to lose you. He has momentum and he’s goal oriented. The goal is to be with you.

He invites you into his life and you feel the relationship is escalating. You sense, he cares about how you feel and he welcomes the responsibility to make long-range plans with you. These are the signs, and this is how to tell a man’s in love with you.

James Allen Hanrahan is a highly sought after dating and relationship coach for STRONG women based in Los Angeles. Get his FREE Chemistry to Commitment formula for lasting love. If you’re a smart woman struggling to achieve relationship success, check out the treasure trove of  men’s secrets to fall in love in Dating Advice for Alpha Women.

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27
Feb, 2017

By James Hanrahan

What Men Are Looking For When They CHECK You Out

Men are always checking you out. Yes checking out your legs, your hair, your body, your eyes. What may surprise you more, is they are checking out your energy.

You’re energy is always showing and it’s giving off signals that you’re probably not even aware of. Some of these signals are attracting men and some aren’t.

It only takes an instant for men to decide they’re attracted to you. You make think that’s superficial but men are taking in far more information than you realize.

Once they say to themselves “yes I’m attracted to her.”The next question they ask themselves is “I wonder if she’s available.”

They decide this by seeing if you look approachable or not.

They take you in checking to see if you’re in your feminine or masculine energy. You may wonder what does that look like to a man?

If you’re in your femininity your appear receptive and available to be approached. This is demonstrated by your smile and eye contact.

If he doesn’t see this signal he will decide you’re in your masculinity at the moment, focused on your business in the world. Doing your best to compete and control in your environment just like he does.

Men can tell just by looking at you how you’re coming across energetically and whether they’re going to be able to win with you or not. Men are not fond of losing or wasting time. If you’re not available they move on.

Your smile and your eye contact are your invitation to a man. They allow him to breathe in the fresh air of your femininity in a busy world. They allow him to stop for a moment to consider what’s really important; our relationships.

Men are looking for a yes in a sea of no’s. Yes, men are checking you out, and the real reason they are, beyond the superficial is, to see if you’re available.

The next time you see a guy checking you out that you like. Give him a devilish smile and watch the world change right before your eyes.

James Allen Hanrahan is a highly sought after dating and relationship coach for STRONG women based in Los Angeles. Get his FREE Chemistry to Commitment formula for lasting love. If you’re a smart woman struggling to achieve relationship success, check out the treasure trove of men’s secrets in Dating Advice for Alpha Women.

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3 Questions To Ask Your Boyfriend To Find Out If He’s Marriage Material
3 Things Men Want More Than Sex
How To Make A Guy Totally Infatuated With You
3 Ways To Tell How MUCH A Guy Likes You
3 UNMISTAKABLE Signs a Man’s in Love With You
What Men Are Looking For When They CHECK You Out