How To Make A Guy Totally Infatuated With You
When you meet a guy you like it can seems like a miracle.
When he starts out treating you like a queen, it’s exciting.
The hard part is when he starts slowing down, not texting as much, not calling and planning dates. This can lead you to believe he’s not interested in you.
With that in mind here are three ways to keep him interested and to understand how men think.
1. The slow down.
It’s natural when a guy first meets you for him to want to spend all his time with you. He’s focused on the goal of being with you. The infatuation phase is like a bubble for just the two of you.
It’s also natural after a few weeks for him to slow down. This is not necessarily a bad thing.
Since he’s probably been neglecting his friends, work and hobbies he’s just coming back into balance. For a guy to have a relationship with you, in the long run, he will need to integrate you into the rest of his life.
The key is to not take it personally and ask him what’s wrong.
Once you understand that this is natural, give him space and he will come bouncing back to you.
2. He takes you for granted.
Once a guy has you he considers you part of his life. This may seem like bad news because he takes you for granted.
Actually, ironically this is good news because he now considers himself to be in a relationship with you.
I’m not suggesting that he can treat you badly, I’m suggesting that he treats you as a normal, everyday part of his life. This is a very good thing that means you can start building a life together.
3. Keep your boundaries.
While he may be normalizing, you want to remind him that the courtship of you is not over.
You do this by not accepting last-minute invitations and by spending time with your friends and your hobbies.
You may be tempted to want to spend all your time with him, but trust the spaces in between.
Men fall in love when they’re away from you.
When he slows down know that it’s natural and don’t try to speed him back up.
If you start to think he’s taking you for granted, reframe it. This means you’re part of his life which is a good thing, within reason.
Always keep your boundaries and let him know when things don’t feel good.
This is the key to keeping him interested because it causes him to stretch to be in a relationship with you.
Your boundaries require him to be a better man. This is the unconscious reason he fell in love with you in the first place and the reason your relationship will last for the long run.
James Allen Hanrahan is a highly sought after dating and relationship coach for STRONG women based in Los Angeles. Get his FREE Chemistry to Commitment formula for lasting love. If you’re a smart woman struggling to achieve relationship success, check out the treasure trove of men’s secrets to fall in love in A Life of Love.
What’s really going on in your dating life?
You’re dating but you’re not meeting anyone you like. You’re busy with life and you have a full calendar of things to do. You’re meeting guys but there not going anywhere. This has been going on for years.
While it may seem like you’re doing everything you can to meet a guy. Including calling your girlfriends about men. There are three things that are missing. Lets talk about them now.
1. You don’t answer calls. When a guy calls you, you don’t answer him for three days. When I ask you why you do this, you tell me that you don’t want to seem too available. That’s funny because a guy is looking for a woman who’s available.
When you finally do call him back after three days he doesn’t answer. And then guess what happens, he doesn’t call you for three days. Then we get into a game of who is cooler than who. The way we start a relationship is the way it ends, to avoid being chronically single. Answer his calls.
2. You’re chronically unavailable. When I guy finally gets hold of you and asks you for a date. You’re unavailable for two weeks. You then let him know that you can see him in three weeks.
While I appreciate that you’re busy and have a full life of friends and business. Did I mention that a guy is looking for a woman who’s available?
Being busy doesn’t make you cool, it just makes you unavailable. Real men don’t waste their time on women who aren’t available for three weeks.
3. You’re in charge. He asks you to go to the park and take a walk. You decide the park is too far away and you don’t like it outdoors. You’d rather go to the coffee shop by your house. Great you know what you want. The problem is real men are not accustomed to following you around, doing it your way.
While your request seems perfectly reasonable to you. It’s signals a man you’re not interested in being on a team, where you’re not the captain. I get arguments about this all the time, but in the end it really comes down to, are you willing to do things for the sake of the team that you wouldn’t ordinarily do.
When you answer his calls, he can make a plan with you. When a man meets you, to him it’s all about momentum. When he asks you to do something and you’re available, he has momentum. This signals him that you’re available. Available means this week not in three weeks.
Lastly do it his way. The reason you want to do it his way, is because you want to find out how he handles reality. You want to know if the way he lives life is something you would enjoy. Doing it your way may seem comfortable to you however let’s look at the results. Is not answering his calls, being unavailable, and being in charge, keeping you chronically single?
If you’re an Alpha woman struggling to achieve relationship success, check out the treasure trove of information in Dating Advice for Alpha Women.
James Allen Hanrahan is a highly sought after dating and relationship coach for STRONG women based in Los Angeles. Get his FREE Chemistry to Commitment formula for lasting love