By James Hanrahan

Why Guys Lose Interest In You So Quickly

If you’ve ever had a guy suddenly lose interest in you after you thought you had something going, you know how painful it can be. There’s nothing like getting the rug pulled out from underneath you.
Is it something you said or something you did? There are so many unanswered questions, and he’s long gone before you can get to the bottom of it.

With this in mind, here are 3 critical reasons why guys suddenly lose interested in you, you’re going to want to know. These will give you the skills to have successful relationships in the future.

1. You had sex too soon.
Frankly, if I’m honest this could realistically be reasons number one, two, and three.
I often patiently walk my coaching clients through this painful step-by-step process until they finally get it. Like, I’m going to do with you now.
Hooking-up and having sex with a guy too soon distracts him from getting to know you as a human being.
The number one reason why guys disappear is they perceived you as a sex object and never really got to know you as a person.
This is an easy fix. When a guy is aiming towards a hook up with you or to have sex with you too soon. Simply state the following; “I’m really attracted to you. You’re funny, charming and sexy. However, I don’t feel comfortable having sex (I’m enjoying making out with you) until I get to know you better.” “What do you think?”
Will this lower your hook-up rates? Absolutely! Will some guys argue with you and complain? Absolutely!
Will a guy who is really into you and wants to get to know you, say “he understands and is willing to get to know you better?” Yes, and that’s what we’re looking for.
You want a guy who cares about how you feel and wants to make sure you’re comfortable. He’s not in a hurry, because he’s comfortable with himself. He enjoys the challenge of winning you over. This is how we separate the mature men who want a relationship from the boys.
2. You suddenly want commitments.
To be fair, this only happens when my clients haven’t followed step one. They get upset when they have sex with a guy too soon and then the guy suddenly becomes less attentive or loses interest. They want to know what’s going on, so they ask him.
The guy for his part thinks you’re cool with hooking- up because frankly, you did. He assumes no responsibility for your feelings because it wasn’t required to sleep with you, and he’s startled when you’re upset.
Then when you ask him about commitments and whether or not he’s really into you? You get a lot of backpedaling and wishy-washy answers until you don’t see him again.
This again is a simple fix. Please use step one, and then you won’t be calling me for advice on what to do in the morning. But, if you have to, no worries, I’m there for you. It won’t be the first time I’ve talked someone of the ledge.
3. You’re not compatible.
Sometimes you’re lives just doesn’t fit together. Men are often the first to recognize this. They realize you want to be married and have children. Or, his career is going to move him out of the state or country. He just doesn’t see a future with you.
And, sometimes since he didn’t take the time to get to know you he loses interest because he’s just not that into you. This usually happens when he wasn’t invested. He hadn’t spent the time to get to know you.
There’s nothing to do about this one. It is what it is. You’re looking for the right guy, and to do that you have to get comfortable losing the wrong ones.
Please, remember rule number one. It’s really rule number two and number three. Don’t have sex too soon. Courtship is a test of time. It will greatly reduce your return and starting overrates. 
Get a guy who wants to pass this test of time and he will be much more ready to be in a relationship with you.
The time to find out if he wants a relationship is before you have sex. Asking for commitments is a much harder sell afterward. As I said, it all comes down to rule one. Require him to get to know you first.
As you get to know a guy, sometimes he will suddenly lose interest because he doesn’t see the point in having a conversation about things that you are not compatible on.  He doesn’t want what you want, and he knows it.
For your part, it’s a good rule to only fight with people you’re going to build with. Resist the urge to argue with him, and if he doesn’t have the skills to communicate and negotiate with you, let him go.
Men are often like children, they want what they want until they get it. They lose interest in toys, and they fall in love with women who require them to get to know them. Be this type of woman. He’ll love you for it.
James Allen Hanrahan is a highly sought after relationship coach for strong women based in Los Angeles who offers a free Chemistry to Commitment formula for lasting love. If you’re a smart woman struggling to achieve relationship success, and tired of dating the wrong guys connect with him via his calendar link to make finding time easy.